Adoptive parents are often conflicted about their children's desire to search for birthparents and/or birthfamily members. Understanding possible insecurities that can lead us to feel threatened or angry is a first step, and understanding why adoptees search and the separateness of that quest from the adoptive family environment is another step. Find insight and information from adoptees, professionals, and other adoptive parents.

Recommended Reading:

• Courageous Blessing, by Carol Demuth
  written for adoptive parents
  

Advice to a Heartbroken Adoptive Parent
An adoptive mom feels abandoned after the reunion of her child and birthparents. Here's some sensitive advice from author Carol Bird.

An Adoption Trilogy
Three women affected by one adoption have interwoven their lives and their stories, from Salon Magazine.

Dear Mom and Dad
In a letter to her parents, adoptee Tina Musso explains her reasons for searching.

My Mothers, Myself
Journalist Colleen Van Tassell's own search gives a revealing look at all sides of this question.

Our Daughter's Russian Family
Parents of international adoptees are often able to locate and develop a relationship with their children's birth families. One parent describes her quest, the reasons behind it, and how she feels it will help her daughter.

Search and Respect in Intercountry Adoption
Adoptive parent Lizette Biel shares her thoughts on birth parents and their countries - both worthy of respect and understanding, and important in the lives of children.

Why Adoptees Search
Adoptees search for birth parents and other birth family members for a myriad of reasons at different times. These articles offer some insight into the reasons why.